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By Daniel Ottalini

Need to kill off an annoying character? Already used a bunch of creative ways to eliminate super important people, and you’d rather not leave a boring person to die by lethal sword thrust? Here’s a slightly humorous, hopefully helpful list of creative causes of calamity for you callous creators of creative creations out there.

  1. Death by Paper Clip
  2. Run over by a train
  3. Falling from a great height (internal monologue included)
  4. Slipped on an icy patch
  5. Strangled when a tie gets caught in a paper shredder
  6. Drowning in any liquid (beer included!)
  7. Getting Rick Rolled too many times.
  8. Crushed by a stack of library books
  9. Starvation during a marathon game of Risk
  10. Tornado
  11. Sharknado
  12. Volcanado (Be prepared)
  13. Extreme Sunburn
  14. Extreme frostbite
  15. Infected animal attack
  16. Infected person attack
  17. Zombies!
  18. Any predatory animal
  19. Any non-predatory animal (Nothing says death like being killed by Koalas)
  20. Arrow Pincushion
  21. Ak-47 Pincushion
  22. Electric Shock from an Electric Toothbrush (A friend’s greatest fear)
  23. Being bored to death
  24. Ghost attack!
  25. Car accident with toy cars
  26. Bar Fight
  27. Dog Fight
  28. Cat fight
  29. Fight Club
  30. Vat of Acid
  31. Vat of Chocolate
  32. Drug overdose
  33. Earthquake!
  34. Red Wedding – Might want to change the name….
  35. Execution by Plasma Gun
  36. Gnome assassin
  37. Ninja Power rangers!
  38. Snowball ambush
  39. Cannonball volley
  40. Crushed by the forces of Magic!
  41. Special mushrooms
  42. Hug-o-war
  43. Ants in the Pants, Ants in the eyes!
  44. Alien Abduction
  45. Branded as a Heretic and burned at the stake
  46. Caught by cannibals and burned as a steak.
  47. Ignoring surroundings in a jungle
  48. Paper plane of death
  49. Ignoring surroundings in your car
  50. Ignoring surroundings at your compu……

 

Need more? Check out Part Two HERE